It Just Shattered & Kitchen Disasters

Cupboard space is at an absolute premium in my urban San Diego kitchen. 

Stuffed much?

So when I went to “push” a bag of sugar back into the cupboard, it “pushed out” a jar of caramel sauce.

It was one of those in slow motion moments.

MY OTHER RECIPES

And it just went splat and shattered when it hit the travertine floor.

The first words out of my mouth were, “Oh Fu*k!” “Oh Fudge!” .  And I don’t mean vegan fudge.

Nothing quite like cleaning sticky caramel sauce with shards of glass embedded in it off the floor. And then hauling out the broom, dustpan, mop, and vacuum and cleaning the floors 17 times just to make sure I got all teeny tiny glass shards cleaned up.

Because I swear, this glass was like dust.

Just beautiful, dusty, razor shards.  Everywhere.  Countertops, the floor, it just multiplied.

I uttered many choice words during the hour long cleanup session.  Just what I had planned on during my busy day, of course.

In the end, I was not as upset that I wasted a perfectly good hour.  I was not upset that I had to clean sticky, gooey, runny caramel with glass shards embedded in it and use an entire roll of paper towels in the process.

No, I was quite ticked that a perfectly great jar of caramel sauce was wasted!  Good thing TJ’s and the grocery store is my second home and I can pick up another jar soon.


You may want to know that I was putting away the sugar because I was making a Microwave Blueberry Banana Oat Cake

An hour later, I finally got my oat cake.

 

From my last post about Quitting the Gym, I am so glad the post resonated with so many of you.  Thanks for the awesome comments!  Some of you really derive benefit from your gym memberships and that’s great.

For others, not so much.  It was refreshing to hear just how many of you have also quit going to the gym, or would like to quit your gym membership and do other things like walks or runs outdoors, or yoga.   

And for me, it was time to move on from the gym and get my workouts accomplished other ways.  And in much more efficient ways.  Life changes, our needs and desires change, and it’s important to stay flexible and roll with the punches of life.  I’d rather do yoga at home than lift and grunt in the gym these days.

Questions:

1. Do you swear?

Yes, I have a potty mouth and although I try not to write swear words on my blog, in real life, yes, I do swear.  Good thing I was the only one home while dealing with broken glass, sticky caramel sauce, and a few F-bombs dropped.

2. Have you ever had a kitchen disaster?  Any spills, breaks, cracks, leaks, dropping things, burning things, fires, etc?

I have had plenty.

Setting off the smoke detector by accidentally burning tofu in the oven that I swear went from raw to charred in the span of 4 minutes.   My house stunk like burnt food (carbony/charcoaley) + decomposing soybeans (tofu) for days.  It was nasty.

Thankfully the Mango Ginger Maple Tofu turned out, in the end.

Then there was the time last summer when I had a gallon of hot, sugared, brewed tea in a glass jar waiting to cool off because I make my own komboucha at home.

Well, the jar cracked and a gallon of hot, sugary tea went all over my countertops, into 5 kitchen drawers with utensils, silverware, pots and pans, dish towels, you name it.  Pretty much every single gadget, utensil and daily-use items in 5 very full kitchen drawers were soaked in sugary tea.  Not to mention it was all over the floors.

The immediate cleanup took about 3 hours, but for months later, I was finding sweet tea droplets on handles of spatulas and on the sides of drawers.  It was a nightmare! Since then, I only use tempered glass.  I know Jessica has even had exploding Pyrex all over her oven so glass isn’t foolproof.

And then there was the time I almost burnt Roasted Coconut & Ginger Peanut Butter Carrots

Nothing quite like the smell of charred peanut butter.  Good thing I caught these just in time and that Scott likes well-done food.

What are some of your kitchen disasters?

68 comments on “It Just Shattered & Kitchen Disasters”

  1. man, that is QUITE the mess. glad you remembered to snap a photo before you started cleaning – haha! a true blogger’s mind at work. just glad you or skylar did not get cut.
    i don’t have a potty mouth, but a well-placed F^$%#^!!! is very therapeutic sometimes!
    i’ve done the same thing, dropped a glass container and made a mess. the last time i did it, i was late to something and the husband kindly cleaned up for me – i owe him!
    hope the rest of your day was better than that hour of clean-up!

  2. Aww! I get really high-strung when I break or spill something. Or, as when I last cooked venison, I set off the smoke alarm. It wasn’t even burning! Bloody fanless stove they’ve stuck us with. But spillage is the worst because of the wasted product.

    My language could make a sailor blush if I get -really- worked up. Normally, I just have an excitable little potty mouth. “Let’s go see ‘Chicago’!” “F*ck yeah!!!” I get it from my father. If I’m really swearing blue streak, he’ll just say “Mimi, keep a civil tongue in your head.”

    Oh, and for your gym post — I totally feel you. For me, I feel more “in the zone” when I’m at the gym, so I go, but I wish I liked working out at home more. Have you ever used a TRX? It’s one of the few home things I like to do. It’s a suspension trainer you can hook on a door. I love doing rows and pushups with it.

  3. I have a kitchen disaster from working in a tiny cafe kitchen. We cooked massive brunches for the customers and one morning I grabbed a metal handle of a pot that had been standing over an open burner for at least half an hour! You better believe there was a lot of foul language uttered that day.

    Your picture of the caramel sauce is great, it just spells out sticky frustration! Glad to hear you got your oat cake in the end :).

  4. awww no :( I hate bnreaking glass! its the absolute WORST to clean up for sure! just when you think you’re done you find all new glass shards everywhere! so sorry that happened, but like you said, its over, in the past, and you will be back at TJ’s probably today LOL

    those roasted carrots with PB and coconut sound ummm FANTASTIC!!!! I cant wait to get more creative in the kitchen soon enough!

  5. I have had a HUGE COSTCO 3 lb bag of coffee beans ( coffee beans don’t weigh that much so picture VOLUME) fall out of the cupboard and explode spreading coffee beans over the entire kitchen floor, under the oven, fridge washer, dishwasher, etc. Those coffee beans seemed to pop up for a year.

    Also at Christmas had a bag of flour fall off the top of the fridge and make a powdered mess that took eons to clean up.

    My sympathy. I hate sticky AND glass. Hard tiles make glass just spread everywhere! Think of the good workout it was cleaning up though. :)

  6. My two-year old breaks things all the time. Get rid of those bags and slowly add in stackable containers. They help so much-my kitchen is small too and I started using sauce jars, bought tupperware, etc. Huge space difference. I also noticed a huge bag of what looks like Chia seeds. If I am correct, where did you buy such a bulk amount at once? I like to eat it every day and it would be nice to buy it bulk like that.

  7. OH NO! Sorry about the caramel spillage :( I’d die since I love caramel too much, haha.

    And yes, I swear like a sailor.

  8. I have more kitchen mishaps and disasters to mention. I’m such a klutz. I am not much of a potty mouth, though, unless I’m really, really angry. If I just drop and break something I’m likely to say “Suuuugar!” or “Rats!”. I think because I grew up in a house where I couldn’t even say the words “shut up” or “sucks” or any even mild language, it just became a habit to use alternative words. :-)

  9. My worst kitchen disaster was an exploding stove-top espresso maker. When I assembled it, I missed a piece, and when it heated up the whole thing just blew up, spilling hot espresso everywhere! We were very lucky that no one was hurt. We had to paint the whole kitchen three times, and still could see some ‘freckles’ here and there.
    Plus, that day was my birthday and the house was full of guests. Ugh.
    I’m not much of a potty mouth, I’d rather burst into tears when disaster strikes.

  10. Augh, that always seems to happen at the MOST inconvenient times! And of course it has to be taken care of immediately when there’s glass involved. Glad it wasn’t any irreplaceable though. I’ve had my fair share of kitchen mishaps too… it’s a part of the foodie world. ;)

  11. I’m pretty bad with swearing, especially when I’m mad/annoyed/etc.

    One of my kitchen disasters was when I was running late for school, my big purse was on my shoulder and when I swung around, I knocked two glass cups off of the counter. (one being my favorite mug) Luckily my mom helped me clean it up so I wasn’t late for school, but it was so frustrating!!

  12. I have a bit of a potty mouth as well. (Maybe I should cut back on my swearing because with my Boston accent, I must SOUND wicked Freakin’ trashy). I don’t swear in my blog because I think it sound horrible. I am very sophisticated in my writing, Ha ha

    I have had numerous baking disasters. Without a doubt, my fire alarm goes off every time I cook. Its not me though, its the sensitive alarm, dirty stove and crappy pots and pans. ;)

  13. Ah, one time… I was working as a waitress in highschool. I was rushing around making a chocolate milkshake for a customer…. I had it all made, then turned to grab something else and knocked the (uncovered) cup over onto ALL of the clean dishes. The dishwasher was not impressed with me!

  14. When I was growing up my parents had a habit of swearing in Italian, and I’ve sort of picked up on it.
    Instead of “oh, fudge” you should have said “oh, caramel sauce!” ;)

    The oat cake looks worth the wait…yum!

  15. It’s a toss-up: Either store things in Tupperware and risk the carcinogenic substances, or use glass jars and risk breakage. Since I no longer have kids to worry about, I’ve been switching to glass jars for the past year. Only had one breakage so far; Rob whacked the jar of raisins on the cupboard door and broke it into a few big pieces. At least it was easy to clean, since all the glass stuck to the raisins.

    Yeah, I’ve been known to drop a few F bombs, but I try to control myself when others are around, including my husband. He does NOT like swearing.

  16. Aww, man. I did that once at a Whole Foods! I bumped into a stack of caramel jars and knocked one off… Oooops.
    I don’t swear. Swearing actually kind of makes me uncomfortable… and I got made fun of a lot for it in college, but even if I try it just sounds wrong coming from me! :P

  17. Oh no, what a sticky mess. It actually looks like one of those trick fake ones. Too bad it wasn’t! I’ve had the same thing happen with a non tempered giant glass stein while steeping tea for guests last summer. It cracked and started running everywhere, doesn’t sound like as big of a mess as your kombucha tea though. I go through periods where I break lots of things in the kitchen. Thankfully my husband likes well done food too. I don’t at all, so he always gets the dark grilled daiyas ;)

  18. Hi :) I have started following your blog recently and I really enjoy it :) Your kitchen disaster made me smile a bit ;) I’m sure it wasn’t funny at all for you when you had to mop sticky sauce off the flour, but it reminded me of several of my own “achievements” in the kitchen, which are actually one of very few things that make me swear ;) Just yesterday I was making crackers inspired by one of your recipes. So I put flax, safflower and pumpkin seeds into my food processor and started processing WITH THE LID HALF-OPEN. How clever it was of me :D Of course, the seeds were flying all over the kitchen. And yes, I did swear :) Not all of them flew out of the blender though, and finally I managed to make the crackers which turned out delicious :)

  19. I do swear…I have been trying to quit for years ;) My husband can have a real potty mouth, my Mom’s face was priceless the first time he said F*(K in front of her when we were dating…now it doesn’t faze her at all.

  20. I’ve also lifted the little flap on our burr coffee grinder while it was running…yep it sprays ground coffee Everywhere!

  21. Oh girl you know I swear ;-) I am such a klutz that I have broken my fair share of “things” in the kitchen. I’ve suddenly become prone to burning myself recently. Not sure what that’s all about. Guess it’s better than cutting myself chopping veggies and such.

  22. I always freak out when I smash glass, because I’m never sure I”ve swept it all up! With this, though, I’d probably by licking the caramel sauce of the floor regardless of splinters :P

  23. First off, I curse like a freakin’ sailor! Second, I am a kitchen disaster. I have spilled, burned, broken…just about anything and everything. Sorry about the caramel.

  24. Oh no!! I would have been more upset that I lost a bottle of sauce too! I don’t have a potty mouth – I try not to curse!

  25. This is truly tragic!! Broken caramel sauce… OH NO!! :) I can imagine how long it would take, not a fun job.

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