It’s Good to Have Friends

Wow I was blown away by how many comments I got on my last post, The Tall & Short of It.  It was interesting to hear who wants to be taller, who wishes they were shorter, and who likes their height and who doesn’t.  I had no idea that height would be such a popular topic.  Thanks to all of you who de-lurked and commented for the first time, and please do so more often.

And thanks for all your glowing compliments about the pictures of Skylar.  Scott’s already talking about keeping the boys away and her dating.  We’ve got a few years though as I remind him.

Yesterday I was so excited to open a package in the mail and find this lovely gift from Holly!

A few weeks ago I sent her a kombucha scoby so that she could start brewing kombucha at home.  Making your own kombucha is super easy.  This is the formula:  Kombucha scoby + brewed and sugared tea + a covered glass jar + time = kombucha.   Obviously doing it the first few times, there are tons of questions and lots of reading is necessary but one you get the hang of it, it’s so easy.

And, home-brewed kombucha tastes better and costs pennies to make a gallon of.  Why would you ever pay like $3.99 for an 8 oz bottle of storebought when you could make a gallon at home for a quarter but I digress.


I never in a million years thought Holly would send me anything.  But boy, I hit the jackpot.

Holly apparently knows that I love all things vanilla.

Yankee vanilla candles are The Best.

And she knows I love this gum.

I wasted no time breaking into it.

Holly is such a sweet person and great friend.  I feel a special kinship with her since she lives in Minnesota and that’s where I grew up.  There’s an expression “Minnesota Nice” and that holds true with Holly.  She is just so nice.

And if that gift wasn’t enough, blog reader, Michele, sent me this stevia.  She couldn’t use it and offered to send it to me.  I would never say no to free stevia!

I have a whole post with my stevia-containing recipes.  Thank you so much, Michele, for your thoughtfulness!

After all that loveliness in the mail, it was time to eat.

Plants with Vegan Slaw Dressing

And Pumpkin Honey Tofu

If you:

freeze the tofu first

then thaw and press the water out of it very well

then bake it

it will turn out very “bread-like”. 

A spongy, pumpkin bread, of sorts.

Dessert: No-Bake Dark Chocolate Coconut Snowballs (Vegan, GF, Freezer-Friendly)

My old pictures are horrible but the dessert still tastes dark, rich, and wonderful.


1. Do you consider yourself to have great friends?

Junior high and high school were not times in my life where I’d say I had “great friends”.  You couldn’t pay me a million dollars to go back to 8th grade.

Conversely, I have gone through periods of my life where I’ve had great friends, such as my later college years and mid-twenties.

Then, as I got older, married, moved around the country many times, I lost touch with many of my college and early 20s friends and the priority of making new friends sort of fell by the wayside.  Just one of those ebbs and flows of life.

Oh, and becoming a mom does nothing for one’s social life!  You are at home with a small, helpless human being.  You exist for them.  Friends?  Huh? When there’s another nursing session needed, a diaper to change, and cooking to be done, I couldn’t imagine finding time to hang out with “friends” back then.  It would have been great, but didn’t happen much.

But now, Skylar is getting older and more independent and re-connecting with my own friends, both online and real life,  is becoming increasingly important to me.

2. How important are friends to you?

I don’t believe it’s healthy long-term to not have friends.

So even though I am not one of those people who “lives” for being a social butterfly and organizing events, get togethers, or dinner parties with friends, and I don’t chat on the phone with friends that often these days, I know in my heart that I do have some really, really solid friendships with a half dozen women, and that’s extremely important to me.

I could call any of them at 3am with anything, and they’d be there for me.  No questions asked.

I also “know” so many people.  We all do. I would say my acquaintance circle is huge.

As well as my circle of friends that although we don’t see each other tons or we’re not BFFs and joined at the hip, they are still good friends and I could count on them and they could count on me for anything.

3. Have you made any friends via the blogsphere?

Oh gosh, tons!  Some of my closest friends now are women I’ve met blogging!  We share the commonality of blogging (which unless you are a blogger or an avid blog reader, it’s hard to fully “get” this world) so there’s that, but we also have been reading each other’s every post for a couple years now.  With thousands of emails exchanged with each other behind the scenes.

I have met so many amazing people through blogging!  If Katie, Madeline, or Jessica, had a nickle for every email we’ve exchanged, we’d all be rich.  Those women have heard me laugh, cry, and I turn to when the chips are down or when I need a pep talk or I need to non-judgmental place to vent.  Or to laugh hysterically about something.

And there are tons and tons of other ladies who I exchange emails with and we laugh and talk shop and talk life.  You all know who you are.

I used to think making friends on the internet was somewhat strange.  Now, I can’t imagine not having the friends I’ve met via the internet and blogosphere!

Tell me about your friends and friendships?  In real life or in the ‘sphere. Do you have lots of friends?  A tight-knit circle or many acquaintances?

69 comments on “It’s Good to Have Friends”

  1. Hi Averie,
    I am new to your blog and really love the recipes. I wanted to let you know about the tofu express gadget. I LOVE it. It totally removes all liquid from tofu and does not take long to do so. I saw it on someone else’s blog and immediately bought one since I eat tofu a lot. I highly recommend it. No more squeezing, using paper towels, weighing your tofu down, freezing, etc. :)
    P.S. Your daughter is adorable!

  2. Thanks for the tip on baking the tofu! Can’t wait to try it out!

    I have a tight circle of friends from high school. Although I don’t have any children, most of my friends do, so I totally understand the difficulties of keeping in touch.

    I have made SO many friends in blogworld! It’s funny because before my introduction into this world, I had never had a friend who I had not met face to face. It’s unreal how the connections form just by starting with a love of food! My first get together with HEAB will attest to that!

  3. I would have to say you are a good friend! Tony and I are best friends and have realized throughout the years that we are the two that stick together. I have one friend from high school that I stay in touch with, but I wouldn’t say we are close anymore. Tony has a couple of friends from high school that we stay in touch with and we have some great friends that we hang out with now and that we love dearly. The unfortunate part is that we realize that a lot of our friends are out of site out of mind people. I have come to accept that and it doesn’t bother me anymore, but it used to. I just accept people for what they can give and car about them no matter what. We can’t expect more out of friendships that what people are capable of and that’s ok. It feels strange some time to actually feel closer to blog friends because we talk on a daily basis. I think you all know more of my day to day life than my own family even cares about. It feels weird knowing that my blog friends will check in on me more regularly than my family. Also, I look forward to being able to travel and see friends where ever I go! Great topic Averie! I have my fingers crossed that Tony will decide for us to come to San Diego this summer so I can see you! Have a great Sunday and enjoy your family!

    • “We can’t expect more out of friendships that what people are capable of and that’s ok.” —that is so true and I have had a parallel coming to terms with friends, people, etc as you have Sarena. This comment from friends and their limitations, to feeling closer to blog friends, to family not knowing/caring…yes, we are living a parallel existence!!!!

      And if you came to SD we would have a BLAST!!!

  4. i have lots of acquaintances from moving around so much but only 1-2 really close friends and i’m totally fine with that! to be honest, it would be difficult for me to focus on more than a couple individuals and be a good friend to them back. i think it’s quite important to maintain relationships! we are relational creatures! i love my bloggie buddies! they have been so helpful as i’ve navigated though my allergy to gluten/tummy woes and just giving me good advice in general!

  5. Yay for friends—and fun mail gifts! My playgroup just did a secret sister for the month of February where we sent little gifts to each other every week! It was so much fun! I need to do it more often just on a whim because it’s such a little happy for the receiver!

    I am going to definitely try the pumpkin tofu recipe. I am always looking for good tofu recipes. By the way, the vegan fudge recipe was GREAT! My 2 year old loved it too—I let it ‘set’ in an elmo cupcake tin and she called it her ‘elmo chocolate’.

    And yes, friends are good. I have a few close ones, but they are all long distance as I’ve moved. And another thing, I have “sort of” made friends through blogs too. It’s nice to have another way of communication sometimes! ;)

  6. What a sweet package from Holly and score on the stevia!

    1. Yes, I feel very lucky to have great friends and family.
    2. Very and I love how many blog friends I’ve made in the last year.
    3. Tons, lots of blogs I enjoy keeping up with daily – so many that I need more time to read, I get frustrated when work and other things keep me from reading as many blogs as I’d like. I do have a lot of friends in real life, but it’s hard to spend time with them with busy schedules.

  7. My husband and I always talk about what loners we are! lol He basically has one friend, his best friend of many, many years. And I have one, my best friend of many, many years. Other than that we have coworkers and acquaintances, but no one really that close. It probably doesn’t help that we are both socially anxious people! In fact, I met him online through AOL IMs. But what’s funny, is that we literally lived just down the street from one another! We had probably seen each other around town before and never knew it!

  8. Like you, I know a LOT of people, but I wouldn’t consider most of them good friends. My mom likes to say you can be friendLY with someone, but not be there friend, and that’s a good way to describe it….I’m still friendly with everyone in my HS class, but of those I’d say I only still consider maybe 12 to be friends. Those friends are amazing though. I really don’t think I’ll ever find as wonderful friends as I made in high school in the real world. Not sure what set my HS apart in terms of the bitchiness that seems to plague most teenagers, but in general it was just a wonderful group of people.

    I don’t have a ton of friends, I must say, but I’ve always been a quality over quantity type of girl. I’m pretty outgoing in person, but I much prefer individual friendships to friend “groups.” There are five friends that I talk to on a regular basis and can go to for any kind of advice, and that’s all I need. The less-close friends are still dear to me, but I’ve never been the kind of person who needs to hang out with someone every night!

  9. Up until about 6th grade I was in a great group of friends, a little on the “popular” side, even. Then dreadful middle school hit; two of the girls started harassing me in 7th, I switched a few friend groups through 8th, and wound up in the great group I am in now :) They actually make me feel wanted and care about me, which is the obvious importance of having friends. I love reading blogs because it lets you relate to other people who share common interests and I like that there are always great new recipes to try out :)

  10. Averie seriously this post made me tear up! I love that I have met some amazng people through this whole blogging process (obviously including you!!) — I struggle with meeting people in real life. I tend to do better with communicating with people through letters or email — meeting in real life seems to add so much pressure.

    I am so glad you like the candles — Yankee is my favorite and I thought Vanilla Lime seems like something you’d really like! (Miss Key Lime Pie Gum Lover!) :)

    I have a few really close friends in real life — and what I love about them is that we can all live our lives and not talk for a few weeks, but when we get together it is like we were never apart. We pick up where we left off. And I know I can call them if I have good news, or if I am sad, or if I just want to talk. True friends can be hard to find, but when you do, you need to hold onto them!

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  13. Oh lady, we would be very rich! I could write a novel about how much your friendship means to me. I’m convinced that one of the reasons we both ended up in Phoenix was to meet and become friends. You are amazing and you know I’ll always be here for you!

  14. I would agree with your experience and say that I didn’t have great friends while growing up. In my teens and early 20’s, I thought other women were annoying; catty and jealous and difficult, and most of my friends were guys. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve found that my girlfriends (all I met since turning 30) have become like sisters, and I would never trade my girls for anything. When husbands are annoying and children break your heard, when parents get sick and siblings fight, when work is beating you up and you just want to escape, they’re there to buy you a beer, make you laugh, and remind you why your life is awesome.

  15. Hi. Really enjoying your blog. I think you have a wonderful perspective on the meaning of friendship.
    Your thoughts on friends you haven’t seen in a while made me think you might be interested in a contest we’re running, where we foot the bill to reunite pals that haven’t seen each other in a while. Take a look at the link below and consider submitting a story. And who knows … you just might win ….

  16. i want to try that gum so bad. i see it on tv all of the time but do not sell it here. i love lime anything.

    the vegan slaw dressing sounds pretty good!

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  18. I have some great friends and have been making many more! Love all around! Hehe

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  20. Awwwe! Love Holly… and you! ;)

    Do you have more scobies? What are you charging for them if you do?

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  22. I have a small group of friends both from high school and now in college. I am still in my first year of college and I still find that I am closer to my high school friends than the college ones. Most of my high school friends seemed to have moved on though and made close friends in college so I feel a bit behind from them. I am in a lot of clubs though at my school so I know a lot of people through that, but those are the only times I see those people. My parents are always telling me fun stories from their college years so I’m hoping that I can start finding more people who I feel like are truly my friends and would be there for me not just to say hello how are you and walk away. I’m enjoying meeting new people though, but it’s not quite the same as my high school friends but maybe that’s because I’ve known them for years not just months. Sorry to vent, :) great post!

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